House rules for dogs!

[josie&holly]

Basic House Rules for Dogs

1/ If you have to throw up, get into a chair, QUICKLY! If you can't manage that in time, get to an Oriental rug. If no Oriental rug is available, any good rug will do.

2/ ALWAYS accompany guests to the bathroom. It's not necessary to do anything; just sit and stare.

3/ Do not allow closed doors in ANY room. To get a door opened, stand on your hind legs and hammer with your forepaws.

4/ When supervising cooking, sit just behind the left heel of the cook. You cannot be seen and thereby stand a better chance of being stepped on, picked up and consoled with food.

5/ Once a door is opened, it's not necessary to use it. After you've ordered an outside door opened, stand halfway in and halfway out and think about several things. It's particularly important during very cold weather, rain, snow, and mosquito season.

6/ And most importantly, Begin people training early. You'll then have a smooth-running household. Humans need to know the basic rules. They can be taught if you start early and are consistent.

How do dogs learn these things? :

[boats85]

Woof !!!!!

ok got it, I am very good with rules 2 and 5, I have a twist with rule 2, I sit and whine like the guests are doing something wrong in bathroom, very embarrising for the uprights.

Skipper

[Marty & Sherry]

Emmy says: At my home it is Dogs Rule House!

[Jessica H]

You must have been in my home when you came up with those rules. Scooter does all of those, especially standing in the door way. Sadie has the bathroom stare down to a science.

[Napi'smom]

Woof, on rule number one since I sleep with my uprights I prefer to throw up on the bed,

and with number 5 I just refuse to go out unless my upright comes with me and walks down to the grass !! she hates that i can tell but I give her the sad eyes look and it works every time

Napoleon

[Chris's Desta]

LOL Thanks for the morning chuckle!

[longhornkelly]

I will say #2 is nice when you're having "digestive issues". I recently had food poisoning and Petey came and stood guard when I was having problems in the bathroom. It was like he was saying to the world "leave her alone, she needs a minute to collect herself!" He looked very concerned.

[Holly_go_lighlty]

OH my, number 5! Our wee little lad has been like this practically from the day we brought him home. In our previous house we had a fenced in yard, so we'd let him out without a lead. He'd stand half in, half out front paws down, butt up in the air, and would just ssssttttrrrreeeettttcccchhhh. We thought he was being passive aggressive, but I guess it's in his DNA.

Another rule he has imposed upon our household. Squeak, then knock on the kennel door about 5 am, which is how I trained my humans to get out of their cozy bed to take me out to teeteepeepeeweewee. When they come to my kennel and open it for me, stay in it (the further toward the back the better), roll around, stretch, lie on my back, stretch, act like I'm going to come out, but don't, rinse and repeat until they come in after me. Quite amusing!

[dinib]

We go through the stretchy-stretchy routine every morning. I have dubbed Buckley "Sir Lazybutt Sleepyhead". He will do the whole rolling around stretching out of the crate until I get tired of waiting, turn around and walk off. Then he decideds to come out of the crate.

[Shorefeet]

That's too funny.

Bailey has all those rules down. The supervised cooking and half in/half out method when we open the back door are her favorites. She also loves to be lazy when we open her crate in the morning... stretching, yawning tucked in the back. When I'm tired of waiting I pretend like I'm going to close the door on the crate but as soon as she sees me touch the door she pops up and comes on out. Then of course it's the stretching and yawning every two feet from the bedroom all the way to the kitchen, and sometimes, she'll take a detour down the hall (which is off limits) to run into my daughter's room and jump on their beds. I love how vocal she can be when she yawns.

[ckthomas00]

Those made me laugh - especially #1. Our entire house is hard wood floors with area rugs - if Bruski gets sick, the first thing he does is go to the most expensive rug in the house - mabey the softness and prettiness makes him feel better

[Maggie15]

#5...especially when its -40 outside, you'd think she'd want get in quick! nope, half in, can't decide... if its nice out, i just leave the door open and walk away!!hahaha! #2, again i wonder what guests think since i leave the door open a bit, since i know she's going to want in!hahaha!

a

[SparkyJonesMom]

Sparky gets out of his crate as soon as I open the door, and he stretches like he's been cramped in a tiny box for hours. His crate is quite big enough for him to do the exact same stretching while he's in it, but this thought doesn't even cross his mind. But he also stretches and crawls on his belly all the way from the crate to the living room every morning.

If we're sitting on the couch eating something, he also makes it a point to be completely annoying and overbearing by pushing his face and whole body as close to the food as possible. If we stick out our arm to block him, that's when he stretches his neck as far as it will go, and he'll look at you with those big eyes that say, "Why aren't you letting me eat your food? I don't understand, Mom!"

[josie&holly]

When Holly gets up - it is me she stretches up.................... she puts her paws gently on my knee and then slides them up so she is fully stretched out and upright! then she looks at me as if to say "arn't I lovely!" and you just have to agree!

A and J - love the picture - looks really cute with the snowface!