The worst day ever I can remember

[OzGirl]

Sandy, I haven't been on for a few days, I'm so sorry for your terrible Thanksgiving. It sounds like things are settling down a little now, I hope Winnie is healing ok, and that you are healing also. You shouldn't have to pick between your furbabies and your family, and hopefully in time they will realise this also.

Good luck with the new arrangements.

Sending ((((hugs)))) to all of you.

Janet.

[Sculptedmoon]

I haven't been on in a while (dog sitting my mother's two Keshonds in additon to our Shaylee and Kyla), so please accept my belated sympathies for all of the stress and heartache you have been going through.

So many had such good advice here and it seems that you have come to a solid decision on how to try and make it work with the three of your babies.

Hugs from us for all of your pups, but I can't help but send an extra special one for Winnie!

Keep the faith, I feel it will all work out for you:)

[Sarah]

What a horrible situation to be in. I'm so sorry your Thanksgiving was such a sad one.

I hope you are able to look back on this someday and are grateful that you gave Elliott your best shot.

[Eliz222]

Sandy, I am so sorry this is happening to you and your family. I have been out of town and was just checking in to see how my Cairn Talk family is doing.

It sounds like you have a plan for your Cairns. You have been given great advice. I wish I could give you a hug in real life, but a big cyber ((((HUG))))) will have to do.

Please continue to keep us updated.

[Taebolily]

Giving you support and much hugs! There has been so much good advice here, I am learning from this experience. My prayers to you and your family.

[goforette]

Kay -

I've been away from the forum on holiday - and I'm so sorry to read about your Thanksgiving. I've had some rocky Thanksgivings too - none so far over the dogs - but sometimes families just don't do well with certain situations - mine included. I wouldn't worry about your daughter and her family. Although I'm not a mother I know what that must have done to your heart, as I've seen it done to my mother and it crushes her. It's all going to blow over eventually. As for the dogs - well gosh I'm not sure what to say. I kind of lean towards Brad a little that sometimes placement in another home sometimes is for the better, even if you feel at the time that no one on earth could possibly love this dog like you could. So far it sounds like Elliott and Maddy haven't struck at another person - just each other and Winnie - but I suppose I'd always worry about that - especially if you're daughter is expecting two new little additions. Your heart will guide you. Most importantly I guess just focus on Winnie and getting her all fixed up. My best wishes for you,

[purebella]

Havent been around for awhile, but just read what happened on Thanksgiving.

I have no advice to give you, but am sending big hugs and thoughts your way.

I know deep down in your heart you will make the right choice, for you, your family and your Cairns.

[Tracy A.]

I have 2 dens in my house, 2 crates and a large pen area. Neither Elliott nor Maddy will be allowed near the kitchen or dining area when eating or preparing food. I'm going to become a tough cookie and demand peace and harmony.

When company comes, only one dog at a time will be let out at a time...they will learn to share the spotlight.

I will treat both Maddy and Elliott the same but Winnie holds the special place and will be treated as such. She will never be allowed to mingle with Elliott but will get time to spend with Maddy.

Hi Sandy:

I haven't been on since before Thanksgiving, my parents just left for Chicago. Sorry to hear about what happened. But you are very right, you can manage the dogs in rotation. It's work, but you can work it out. Mett & Bratt have to be kept seperate from my parents dogs at all times during visits. Both German Sheps. are not fond of my dogs. So we rotate the dogs for people time during the course of a day.

If I recall, you are the Queen of baby gates and Ex-Pens- which the tools of canine harmony.

Brad has given some great advice.

I recall one breeder friend of my parents who had two male German Sheps who hated eachother. They had to be kept out of site of eachother at all times. Somehow they made work, and neither dog killed eachother. So this is very do-able.

Tracy

[hallswel]

Sandy

Lots of wisdom here from your Cairn family. I do understand how your family felt, a friend of mine had rescued a boxer and had 3 dobys and they got into a fight. When Sylvia broke them up she had to get 21 stiches in her hand and the boxer had too many to count. Her husband said the boxer had to go, his concern was for her. I thought the same thing. But when I took her something for diner I realized I was wrong, a real dog fight is horrible but you have to look at what caused it. She figured out it was over a toy. We talked for a long time and the boxer is still there and they have divided the yard now with a fence down the middle. When they come in the house in the evening her oldest girl sleeps with them, the two male dobys sleep in the living room and the boxer sleeps in the master bath. All are content with that.

I believe keeping them seperate may well work, I have to feed mine in the crates, I tell them go to your rooms if you want to eat and they all run jump in the crates, even little Harley. Sugar is my bully, she will growl and fuss when she wants something and the boys give in and for now Harley does but as she gets older that might change. I have to crate mine when we have large gathering because not all my family understand about the dogs (Inlaws). Mine don't mind the crates.

The link to the Vet sounds positive. I believe in most cases you are not given more than you can handle and you are doing a good job making sound decisions.

Take care of yourself and all of your family

Liz

[savannahsmom35]

I am just getting on since Wednesday so I am late on this. I just wanted to offer my support. I can't imagine being in a situation like this. I think that I would have made the same decision that you have. I would have to make ALL attempts to make it work before I could give my furbaby back. If you do every thing in your power to make this work and there are still problems, then I would consider taking Elliot back to the breeder, although it would be with a heavy heart. I really hope that you and your family are able to work this out in a way that is good for everyone involved, the family, and the dogs. I am also glad to hear that Winnie is feeling better. I hope that the vet bills weren't too bad. Please PM me if you need to talk.

Somer

Savannah's Mom

[grillywarren]

Hi Sandy!

Just checking in to see how you are? How is Winnie?

I hope things are going well.

Ellie

[Teri9672]

I'm so sorry about you holiday. I'm just checking in and haven't been on the boards since Wednesday.

I hope Winnie is recovering quickly.

I too have had to make changes because of the girls fighting. I now NEVER feed them unless they are both crated. I also can no longer give them rawhide unless one or both are crated (it always started a battle).

I also know certain stressful situations can cause mayham and I try to make sure they are apart. For instance, if I ever have to board them at the vet, I request they are placed in seperate cages. The stess of boarding makes Tabitha uneasy and Teona picks up on her stress and picks a fight. At home they sleep together in the same crate, but when away they must be seperated.

I also know the look they give when they want to be left alone and I make sure they stay apart.

It's been a while since they went at each other and they seem to play more and more. I know it has gotten better since Teona has gotten older. She's much more calm than before. Since they are 6 years apart I know I may have more problems once Tabitha gets further up in her senior years and I will adjust life accordingly.

I know you love your babies and I hope you can make it work. Keep a positive outlook

[Kathryn]

Kay -

I wasn't on-line all weekend, and I just read about your Thanskgiving. I don't have any advice, but I do have lots of care and concern for you, your dogs and your family. You really did have a horrible day, with all involved in chaos. I hope that things settle down with the new week.

More ((((hugs)))) from here.

Kathryn

[kayharley]

Winnie is doing great...she is one tough dog. Yesterday she barked up a storm as my hubby was putting in new windows and making alot of noise. Then she settled down to her licky-licky toys and played. Her appetite is good and I've been sneaking her some nice little tidbits of people food.

My daughter has called a few times and mentioned that part of the reason they left was because of my mother....she has a tendency to make a bad situation worse by ranting and raving.

My system has been working out great and as long as family members abide and respect it, hopefully we'll have smooth sailing.

I did get a very nice present last night, however. My husband was taking a nap in the den, lying on the sofa. I walked past the room and did a double-take....there was Elliott lying on his chest, both of them nose to nose. This was AFTER DH said he wanted nothing to do with that dog, he didn't want to play with that dog, didn't want to keep that dog...

Again...thank you all so much for your support, help, advice and honesty.

[jetersmom]

So good to hear your good news!

[mrskti]

Sandy sometimes we just need to step back, asses the situation and not PANIC!!!! They dont have to be in our faces all the time, just cause we love them to death doesnt mean everyone else does. I think you can work it out....and make your mom have holidays somewhere else! LOL, just kidding!!!!!

[kayharley]

I think you can work it out....and make your mom have holidays somewhere else! LOL, just kidding!!!!!

Both my sisters moved out west years ago....I wonder if it's because our mother doesn't like to travel?

I love my mom dearly but she's never been an animal lover and we grew up without dogs in our life. Maybe that's why I'm now making up for lost years without them.

[grillywarren]

Glad to hear things are better.

Cute image of the nose to nose nap!

Ellie

[Scully'sMom]

What a terrific start to my day - to read that little Winnie is doing so well and that Elliott and his dad have "re-bonded." I wish I could have seen a picture of them sleeping - it must have been adorable.

I'm so glad that things have turned around for you!

[mrskti]

Both my sisters moved out west years ago....I wonder if it's because our mother doesn't like to travel?

I love my mom dearly but she's never been an animal lover and we grew up without dogs in our life. Maybe that's why I'm now making up for lost years without them.

Well you know, stranger things have happened to people!!!! And yes, I suppose we can be making up for lost time. But, so what. And i know people that arent dog people can make it tough on us that are. My daughter has dubbed me the crazy puppy lady, but she meant it lovingly. She was actually excited to see the girls when i got them because of developing a terrible cat allergy after all these years, but after I left her after showing her the pups....she called me as said guess she was allergic to them too, cause her eyes were all swelled up. Bummed me out. But she's understanding of them. Now my older sister would be a pain in the butt....but she is anyway......but i digress!!!!! LOL So i've adopted the attitude, love me, love my dogs.....or just plain ol' tough!!!!!!

[maggie]

It sounds like everything is falling into place, I'm glad your daughter called; seems like she's trying to smooth things out. It's wonderful that Winnie is recuperating so well and DH and Elliott are bonding again. I hope YOU are feeling much better!

[tena]

I am so glad Winnie is feeling better. Little sneaky bites of treats will help Seperation seems like a logical and doable idea. Get everyone in the family on the same page and see how it goes. Good luck

[Tracy A.]

Hi Sandy:

Glad to hear that Hubby is doing better. My DH has knee-jerk reactions too when things don't go well too. But then he settles down in a few days. Once you get your system fine tuned, it will get easier.

[Kramersmom]

Sandy,

Great news!!! I'm so glad all this will work out. I know you where so heart broken to even think of having to give Elliot back, I know by your words just how much he means to you. Glad as well to here Winnie is too good. I bet she is enjoying the tid bits of people food, she deserves it!

Glad this turned out to be heart warming.

[momofelouise]

I'm confused - what I got from your post is that, basically, your dogs got into a fight with each other and everyone started crying and left before dinner! This is the most moronic thing I have ever heard! If i were somewhere for dinner and someone's dogs broke out in a fight with eachother I'd say, "Wow, that was exciting". Obviously, had they stayed, you would have had the dogs crated and there would have been peace and quiet. This is so ridiculous!!!! I can't figure out why they took it so personally! jeepers!!!!!!!!!! I would jsut tell them all to get over it!!! Personally, I wouldn't want them back again if they flipped out over something so stupid!