Behavior Change/Greeting at Door

[Cairn Parent]

I'm the parent of a 2.5-year-old neutered, male Cairn. He has always enjoyed greeting us at the door when we arrive home. This behavior stopped recently after he had been boarded with some other dogs during a one-week vacation. Now when we arrive home, he remains stubbornly on his cushion and looks conflicted: both like he wants to wag (but won't) and is happy we're home, but also  like he chooses to stay put and not greet us. Of course he can do what he wants, but it's nice to be greeted. Sometimes I think he's punishing us for having left him, even though I know he had fun with the other dogs. Or maybe he's punishing us for taking him away from the other dogs! Am I reading too much into this? How can we encourage him to feel positive about our arrivals home again? In general, he's seemed a little "low" in other ways since coming home from boarding. He seems more focused on rote routines (food, walks) than on enjoying people time. I should also note that our daytime schedule has changed recently, too, so maybe he's reacting to being left a bit more often and is letting us know he's not happy about this. Any thoughts? How can we curry favor with him again?

[Guest dog person]

First, rule out medical causes whenever you see a sudden change in behavior.

Is he due for a routine exam?      Take him in.

If all checks out okay consider having someone come to your home every few hours for feeding, bathroom breaks instead of putting him in a kennel the next time you go on vacation.

I do this for a neighbor and they tell me it has made a world of difference, their dog stops eating and gets diarrhea when kenneled. 

Otherwise, just give him some time.....

Some dogs don't do well when kenneled.

Edited January 14, 2019 by dog person

[Cairn Parent]

Thanks for your response!

He is not due for a routine exam (he was seen in the fall), but I may take him in anyway. It's good advice.

Also thanks for the tip about vacation options.

If anyone else has thoughts, I'm happy to hear them!

[Guest dog person]

Some dogs get extremely anxious at the kennel.        Maybe he got into a scuffle with another dog?

Anyway if the change in behavior is lasting more than 3 days I think you are right to consult the vet.

If his appetite is good I wouldn't be too worried.    Sounds like he just got upset about being kenneled especially if he has never been before.

If he was a rescue he may have felt abandoned and thought you weren't coming back.  Doggie PTSD?

Ask the vet if medication might help the next time you have to leave him for more than a day.

 

Edited January 15, 2019 by dog person

[Sam I Am]

I notice in Sams case as he is maturing that he also likes his “me” time. For him that is sitting behind closed curtains so he can Survey the neighbors. Other times he is a cuddle bug . Terriers are definitely more independent than a lot of other breeds.

[Idaho Cairns]

Being "parents of", being "punished by", and "currying favor from" a dog kinda indicates you are projecting far too many human traits on your dog.  While pretty intelligent, for dogs, the Cairn isn't really capable of long term human psychological manipulation on a human level. 
Perhaps your pup is reacting to a sudden and rather lengthy (one week) change in environment and is simply coming down from or being confused by the experience but what I gather from your description the problem may be more likely the understandable guilt you are feeling about having left the dog for so long.  Sort of a case of "your own bad breath blowing back in your face" about what you imagine is the problem.
Patience is probably the best advice I could give you--both concerning your dog's behavior and your reaction to what you think might be going on.
Just remember that you are dealing with an animal that doesn't (thankfully) have a human psyche or human emotions and consider that you might be the entity that is overreacting. 
 

Edited January 15, 2019 by Idaho Cairns

[Guest dog person]

You also mentioned a change in your hours away from home.    Dogs thrive on routine and do not appreciate change, so that's an adjustment too.

You are not overreacting or projecting.      Dogs can suffer from depression, anxiety and ptsd just like people can.      

You are wise to observe subtle changes in behavior.   Keep an eye on him and if you don't see improvement in the near future, give your vet a call to discuss.    You don't want this to develop into separation anxiety.   

Good luck, I'll just let the others speak now.

Edited January 15, 2019 by dog person

[sanford]

18 minutes ago, Idaho Cairns said:

Just remember that you are dealing with an animal that doesn't (thankfully) have a human psyche or human emotions and consider that you might be the entity that is overreacting. 

But we are in unknown territory, Idaho...because dogs do have emotions and psyches and in fact, live by those emotions, even though they are not human emotions, they matter and should be acknowledged. If some -  (or many) of us tend to overreact, it probably results from feeling frustrated with our inability to better understand them and their emotional needs.

[Sam I Am]

 

I agree that all animals have their own emotions and reactions to different scenarios and of course they differ from ours in that we are far more complex in our thinking however  I believe theirs is more a survival instinctive behaviour hence their adaption to changing circumstances usually easier than we humans....we go to mental places animals don’t. Also and this is so true of dealing with horses, which I have done all my life, is that our anxiety, fears and the way we present those to our animals triggers their behaviour.  i.e. If I am on a horse who is relaxed while I am riding her and suddenly I think that there will be something on the road that she hasn’t even reacted too and I tighten my hold on the reins and my legs, she will perceive that there must be danger ahead. Dogs live so close with us that any change in our behaviour can trigger a change in theirs however I would think for most part they adapt very easily unless they have been treated badly...and I would say most dogs recover quickly.  A prime example is how well most street dogs and dogs from shelters adapt to their new homes. Sanford I wonder as humans our emotional needs are way higher than most animals and perhaps that’s where our frustrations comes from because an animals behaviour is all based on survival....we with our human brains go way beyond that and need a reason ...animals don’t, they just react.

Edited January 15, 2019 by Terrier lover

[Hillscreek]

 Seems to me that Cairn Parents dog was surprised and disoriented by the experience of being boarded plus the change in his daily routine at home. I would say Just go about things in a normal manner. Greet him casually as you come back. Make sure to have play/fun times. Go on walks together. Be relaxed around time - he will know if you are anxious and tense. Give him time to adjust. He might or might not go back to greeting you. As you say that's up to him. We can't make dogs (or people) love us.

Personally I don't think dogs punish a person - rather that they react to a situation that may or may not threaten their welfare. Survival is uppermost, I was concerned when Angus went to love with my friend and her dogs and mules, even though he had known them all his life. Apart from being sad he couldn't be with me any more it would have been very easy to feel "guilty". But as my friend and I had foreseen, although confused for a day or two days he rapidly adjusted to living in his new home. Now when I see him he greets me but doesn't try to come with me and he looks to her for what's needed.

I used to board a previous dog I had for two weeks at a time when I went on vacations. He was with a groomer/boarder he knew and liked. She told me he fussed and was upset for a couple of days but then he settled into her routine. By the time I came back he was wondering why I was taking him away from her. H-m-m does he like her more than me I could have said  Then after a day back home we were back to normal.

 

[Idaho Cairns]

" I wonder as humans our emotional needs are way higher than most animals and perhaps that’s where our frustrations comes from because an animals behaviour is all based on survival....we with our human brains go way beyond that and need a reason ...animals don’t, they just react."  Terrier Lover

We should probably have the above printed on little cards so we can refer to it often as we try to muddle thru and sort out what is and is not going on in our relationships with our dogs.  It would keep us happier and, as we know/assume, happy owners do happy dogs make.

 

[sanford]

Another theory re his change of demeanor since returning from boarding: In spite of having had a good time, perhaps something unpleasant occurred there? Ruffy exhibited the same behavior change - acting "low", not being his usual spirited self, etc., after he was attacked by a large Husky mix a couple of years ago. Ruffy was shook up, but thankfully undamaged, but the attack was serious enough to require a vet visit for a checkup and he wasn't himself for a few days.

Edited January 16, 2019 by sanford

[hheldorfer]

Cairns can be quirky little people.  Nattie (9-year-old female) is extremely sensitive to any change in routine or environment.  We spent a day moving furniture and painting a room last year, and Nattie became so overwhelmed that she hid and avoided us for several hours, then vomited once.  It took a few days of re-establishing the normal routine before she appeared to snap out of it.  

My advice would be to go about your business and follow your normal routine, and your boy will be eventually be okay.