I feel awful

[Dempsy's Mom]

Well.  Yesterday morning about 5 a.m. we had to take a semi to North Dakota to get worked on.  When we went out to the shop Wert wasn't in his cage.  I found Wert on the other side of the shop dead.  I was shocked.  I sat down on the floor and was stoking him, while Jim stood over us and listed all the scenarios of what could of happened.  Of course the more he talked the worse it got.  I could see that Wert was moving his legs back n' forth in the dust on the floor.  

 

Wert was staying in the shop and getting along quite well with it.  There is a lot of activity out there and he was happy.  I had a large crate for him and at first I locked him in at night and then it got more lenient and he would come and go whenever he wanted.  We had a man come from town to work on this semi before we took it up to North Dakota.  There didn't seem to be any antifreeze or any other type of poison that he could of got into. I don't know what happened.  And then to make it worse I didn't have the time to spend with Wert - we needed to be up in North Dakota for this appointment.  It was a miserable trip.  Elsie came with me.  We stopped in this dinky little town for breakfast and ended up eating with Santa Claus.  My mind was starting to relax a little.

 

Got home.  I was wondering what I was going to do with Wert.  Just so happens that Jim was tearing out some trees down the road.  I gathered Wert up and there was a big root ball on a tree that they had dug out.  I wrapped Wert in one of his blankets and laid him in the ground and took the bobcat and laid dirt over him.  I feel horrible that I was not there for him when he needed me the most.

 

I can make up all the excuses in the world but what it comes down to is that I wasn't spending enough time with Wert.  The men spent more time with Wert than I.  I was in the house doing year-end work and Christmas stuff.  I probably only saw him once a day.  He came into the house the first part of winter and then he started marking and I thought the next best place for you is in the heated shop. 

 

So I said farewell to this rambling soul that came into my life for such a brief time.  He was quite the character.  I never thought that Wert was given a chance as a puppy.  He always carried a little sadness with him and I could never make it go away completely. Now RIP dear Wert.

 

[Sam I Am]

Oh Lori I am so sorry. You have nothing to feel guilty about! You gave him a loving home, food and shelter. More than anyone else was going to do for him. He wasn't a young dog and who knows perhaps he had heart failure and nothing could have been done. I know what is haunting you probably and that is that he died alone. Just remember that most animals go away on their own and hide when death is near. I was with Jock right to the bitter end and I still feel guilty about ending his life , even though it was the right thing to do.

Big hugs to you and the rest of the critters. Something tells me some other needy animals will wonder Into your farm yard again....perhaps it's a higher power that sends them. Knowing you will care for them.

Lynn

Edited December 19, 2014 by Terrier lover

[Hillscreek]

Lori you gave Wert a home when he needed one. Perhaps this short time with you and the rest was the best time in his life. We can't always control what happens. He's at peace now - you be at peace too.

[Autumn & Lola]

Aw Lori, how heartbreaking. Please don't feel badly. You did well by Wert and gave him a home when he needed one. It always hurts, no matter if we are with them or not in the end. I'm so sorry. Hugs to you.

[Dempsy's Mom]

Thank you guys.  I will miss Wert.  He never let me clean him up much.  He wouldn't let me brush him.  It was amazing that he let us shave him.  He was a special dog in the way he thought and acted.  Dempsy missed him right away, because they would always have their poo walks together.  It's a little lonely on our poo walks now.

[Islander]

Hugs to you Lori. You will never know what Wert went through in his life but you know that he was safe, warm, dry and cared for with you and your family.

[remltr]

Lori, I can only imagine how sad you feel. Keep in mind that had Wert and your family not come together, there is no telling how his life would have progressed. He very likely would not have survived as long as he did. You did a wonderful thing by caring for and loving him. God bless you for being who you are.

[hheldorfer]

I'm terribly sorry to hear of Wert's passing.  Wert was a good soul and you did the right thing by taking him in and making him part of your family.  The poor guy had probably never known such a good home.  You did the best you could and there's no reason to feel as if you failed him somehow.  Good heavens, Lori, we are all amazed  (and humbled) at how you manage to take care of the house, take care of Jim, Dempsy, Elsie and Kitty and spend countless hours working on the farm.  Wert was lucky to spend his last days in a place where he was loved and cared for.

 

Hugs,

Helene

[josie&holly]

Wert was very blessed when he found a home with you on that farm and had a better life than he had probably ever had before. Sorry to hear he has gone but am sure he died knowing that he was cared for.

[LindaMC]

Your post really shook me, I never expected to read that Wert had passed, I'm so terribly sorry.  It must have been his time, please don't be hard on yourself, you opened up your heart to this wandering soul, gave him good food, a warm place to sleep and more than anything else, you gave him love.  I'm sure he knew that Lori.  As other's have said, you don't know where he came from or what he had endured in his life before he came to you.  Take care of yourself, you did a wonderful thing by taking him in.

[Pepper Bug's Mom]

Oh no....I am so sorry about Wert.  He found the BEST home ever with your family and I am so glad that you welcomed him into your hearts.  It is always so hard to lose one of our furbabies but Wert was in a safe and warm place for his last months...

[Malcolm's Dad]

Sorry to hear about Wert. You gave him the best time of his life like everyone said. Hugs to you from a parrot and a dog who say "Thanks for caring about the homeless animals."

[Dempsy's Mom]

Thank you all.

[kieiras mom]

so sorry to hear this , Wert had wonderful life with you all, probably the best time of his life. Know you will miss him and so will we on the forum. Love to all of you

[kjwarnold]

Aw, sorry to hear about Wert. He was lucky to find you guys and we all know you were good to him. Give Dempsey some extra squishes while he misses his poo buddy.

[pkcrossley]

this is terrible news for all of us. i'm grateful that he found you, and that we all got to know him thanks to your generosity toward him and toward us. he was a remarkable character and we all loved meeting him. he was old, and he probably knew he didn't long when he came to you. great man, wert.

[sanford]

Oh Lori… This was such a shock… It went right through me and I had to re-read your post in order to believe my eyes — not wanting this to be true! 

 

I am so sorry for your loss of dear Wert. Please don't ever, ever feel that you let him down in any way. As is true for many of us, we lead very busy lives, yet our cairns always forgive us when distractions take our attention from them. None of us humans are perfect, yet I can know for sure that Wert appreciated you unconditionally!

 

You did your best, and just knowing you as I do, I am assured that your best is far and away beyond what many others could have done!

 

Please accept my condolences and my appreciation. You gave Wert a greater life than he could ever have had anywhere else.

Edited December 24, 2014 by sanford

[Tuesday]

Lori,

I could bump into you on the street and not recognize you (unless Demps was with you, of course ), but through the gift of Cairns and your writing I feel like I 'know' you, or at least a part of you.

You have a huge heart and caring soul.  You are kind to all creatures.

 

You gave this wayward soul a home and love - more than many would or advised you to.  Way more.  

 

You gave Wert a home and friends.

 

I am so sorry for your loss and my heart hurts for you, but please remember how much love you gave this little guy who came into your life for a season.

 

ox

Edited December 25, 2014 by Tuesday