Imminent Loss

[Kathryn]

Oh Tara - you didn't need this right now.  I know how important Olie is to you, though, and it really is excellent that you have caught the growth quickly.  You will both be on my mind this holiday season....hope all goes well.

[tlwtheq]

I love my friends, here, so much.  I'm losing Olie and my beautiful parakeet, Deion, at the same time.  It's horribly depressing.

 

[Dempsy's Mom]

So sorry Tara.  We all feel for what you are going through.  Thoughts, prayers and hugs.

[Hillscreek]

[pkcrossley]

feeling for you. 

[Idaho Cairns]

Hope for the best and steel yourself for any  negative outcome.  Try to focus on all the pleasure Olie has provided you.  Obviously you have done the best that you could possibly do--far more than most.  We invite these little pleasures into our hearts and one thing we know is that we can keep them there, safe and sound, forever--you will never lose Olie.
Thinking of you during this difficult time.

[Tuesday]

Wishing you peace in the days ahead.  We are all walking by your side.  OX

[hheldorfer]

Hugs to you Tara.  We're with you on this journey.

[Sam I Am]

We all take this journey when we love our pets but its never ever easy. We love them with a passion and never want them to suffer, and we suffer also. Deeply. You have been an amazing and caring  caretaker of all your animals  which in my world makes you a blessed and caring human being. Your journey hasn't been an easy one of late but we are all with you in spirit Tara to help you get through this. And you will. 

Edited December 4, 2015 by Terrier lover

[Autumn & Lola]

I'm so sorry, Tara, especially to be going through this with both Ollie and Deion at the same time just isn't fair.   Thinking of you.

[tlwtheq]

Thanks, everyone.  Sometimes I just get very, very tired.  Olie's next appointment is on Monday..it costs $140.00 just to walk through the door.  Still haven't paid off Care Credit for Simba's latest surgery.  It sucks being 60 and poor.

[Idaho Cairns]

Tara, there's where you can learn a lesson from dogs, they don't worry about "rich or poor", "up or down", they just keep on caring and loving, the way dogs do.  Adopt to the extent you can, the same attitude toward your life--let it roll, believing, as your Olie does, that all will be well down the line.  When all options seem gone, they aren't.  Took me a long time to quit worrying about money I spent or had to spend--it was just done or had to be done.  Clouds clear, storms move out, leaving wreckage we pick up, dispose of, and we go on.  I will, as I have, send as much spirit support as I can--knowing life is not easy for you, knowing I do not know your situation, thoughts, fears, and future--it is all any of us can do.  Just understand it is here and there with you.  Peace. Chuck

Edited December 4, 2015 by Idaho Cairns

[Sam I Am]

Oh Chuck now I have tears forming. Written so well and wise words to live by! Thanks for this.

[tlwtheq]

Thank you Chuck, and Mrs. Chuck (sorry I was not able to look it up right now, you've been very kind and wise as well.)  There are actually equally pressing matters with regard to "family matters" in my life.  People from all directions seem to believe I am the ultimate solution to their difficulties.  DH is having a good time doing sound for a band this evening  (I can still support the household all on my own, right?).  Adoptive Mom (93) in FL has never mentioned me to Elder Services who are trying to help her, (Mom loves my miscreant adoptive sister).  She's been giving her last dime to miscreant adoptive sister for the last 50 years.  Now she has her 90 year old boy friend giving his last dime to miscreant "sister".   Human services stepped in...according to her,adoptive Mom is going no where; she's staying put!   She knew adoptive sister (younger) was a bad penny but has denied it (something about meningitis when she was 4...she was much more brilliant than I before that); adoptive sister is still the "good one" and must be saved (I will never curry Mom's favor...too introverted, not flashy enough).  Can't get adoptive Mom, who is suffering dementia, to agree to any kind of assisted living.  At this point, she is militant about it.  When we talk via telephone, her speech is slurred and she continues to repeat nonsensical thoughts.  She always thought I was the "less favourable daughter", with nothing to offer society.  Oops, not the function of Cairn Talk.  This is the place I come when I'm being squeezed so badly I can't stand it.  Please forgive me.

Tara

[Idaho Cairns]

Tara, of course I "forgive" you and I'm sure the rest of the folks here as well.  Only thing I can advise about family is a lesson I learned a long time ago--when my family, or any other one I was involved in, started to look like a big old circus, I just hollered, "Bring in the Clowns!", sat back and watched the show!
It's the only thing that has ever worked for me--start that irritating family stuff crawling around me and I'm "outta there".  
I'm no mental midget but I'm big enough and smart enough to know when I'm beat in a battle that never has a victory--family in-fighting.
Another thing, don't overthink what you "think" other people think about you--99 out of 100 times, people, even those close to us, rarely think about someone else because they are way too busy thinking about themselves.  That belief has saved me a lot of self-imposed grief over the years.  Listen to "Old Dogs, Children, and Watermelon Wine" a few times--that'll get you lined out.
Focus on the problems you can impact, like little Olie, who needs you and who certainly does, without exemption, love you with all his heart.  You may not be able to save him but you CAN make his life easier until fate wends its way to where it inevitably is going to go.
Free yourself up Tara, don't take on negative stuff that you haven't solved, couldn't solve, and probably shouldn't even try to solve.  Don't let others make you the fairy with the magic wand--give 'em the old "What me worry?" look and send 'em packing.  If you could have solved it, it would be solved.
Take care of yourself first--once that is done you can move on to others--if you really want to.
Love ya, Chuck

[tlwtheq]

You have a bit of a philosopher and poet in you Chuck.  I appreciate that; it's very comforting.  Tara

Thanks for getting Olie the Goalie's name.  T.

Edited December 5, 2015 by tlwtheq
Addendum

[tlwtheq]

Olie's next surgery is tomorrow.

[Hillscreek]

You know we'll all be thinking of you and Olie.

[Malcolm's Dad]

Hoping for the best outcome.

[Idaho Cairns]

Let's hope this time the procedure is the cure--little Olie needs a break.  Thinking about you both.

[beccadiane374]

Wishing Olie well & praying for peace for you!

[Jack]

Our thoughts and prayers are with you and yours...hoping for the most positive outcome.

[tlwtheq]

Haven't heard back yet.  All of Olie's lab work-up looked great, and he was in his usual excellent spirits this AM.

Thanks everyone,

Tara

[tlwtheq]

Olie's just out of surgery.  Came through it just fine.  The surgeon says we can't do this type of surgery again because of all the scar tissue left from the first two attempts to get all of the growth.  We are electing not to do chemo or radiation in that it would involve taking Olie 60+ miles one way 3 times a week for 3-4 weeks.  Suppose this is his last year with us?  I won't put him through all that...being away from home and feeling so sick from the treatments.  We're blessed to have had this this long.  Pickup tomorrow around 9.  I love my baby.

[bradl]

Well done Olie. Rest and get ready for some careful extra lovin' tomorrow.