Imminent Loss

[tlwtheq]

Olie's rear-end tumor has more than doubled in size in just 5 months.It will soon interfere with

his ability to relieve himself..it's that close to his rectum.  It is an aggressive sarcoma.

The doctor says it's firmly planted, not something that can pop right out. It is right next to his

large intestine and rectum. To remove it risks incontinence.  Husband says he can't live with

the incontinence thing.  (He's the one who's home all day; can't he change a few diapers?  I know

it's not that simple, but I still hate having the law laid down to me by someone who's refused to contribute

to the family income for over 10 years.)

 

Out vet has referred us to the "Guys from Dover" in Annapolis who are specialists and all experienced

surgeons ($$$$).  We're going to see if someone there is confident enough to try to remove

the tumor.  Our vet has already prepared us for having to euthanize a pup who has all his mental

faculties and is otherwise healthy.  He's 14.5 years old and full of energy...too young, too young.

 

I'm a very sad human right now.  All the choices are crappy.

 

Thanks for listening.

 

Tara

 

[Hillscreek]

OhTara. So sorry. Tough days ahead. We'll be thinking of you - and Ollie.  

[shergry]

I feel your pain all the way to TX.  I know this may not come as any comfort....there is a site carecredit.com

They deal with human and pet bills...giving you some relief in many options of payment.  We sure wish we knew about this site before our Betsy's surgery....$5,500.  But we did use this for both our crowns, made the procedure a little easier to swallow.

I pray for Olie and you both decide what is best for the each of you.  I mean to say that he loves you, trust you, and whatever you decide he will always love you.

Olie needs to see his Capitals get closer to the cup.

Lots and lots of hugs are being sent your way.

All on this forum truly are holding you tight in your time of need.  Prayers are flowing.  Olie is getting paws up from TX and ALL over the world!!!

[sanford]

Oh Tara, this is such a tough decision, with no easy resolution. Letting Ollie go would be such a devastating loss for you. But subjecting him to the type of surgery he needs could affect and impact Ollie in negative ways and possibly diminish his quality of life. I'm sad for you, but I want you to know that just knowing you from this forum gives me faith that your love and devotion for Ollie will guide you in making the right decision for him.

Keeping you both in my prayers!

[tlwtheq]

Thanks.

[bradl]

All the choices do seem crappy when they reach a certain point … even when choices are clear they don't seem to feel any better and when the choices are not clear … argh. 

 

For whatever it's worth, a dog doesn't get to be 14.5 without experiencing a whole lot of love and care. If it turns out to have been a lifetime's worth, what a kind and loving and generally grand lifetime it will have been. Doesn't seem to hurt any less though, for all of that.

 

I guess I've come to accept a the idea of "Better a [day/week/month] too early than a [minute/hour/day] too late."  I suspect whatever path Olie takes, you will know if it's time, when it's time.  Till then, love and warmth to Olie and his family.

[pkcrossley]

i'm so sorry you have reached this point, which most of us will at some time or other. if ollie is comfortable that is worth a lot while you figure out what to do. i know 14.5 is too young, and if he is full of energy and interested in life it makes it so complicated for you. it helps if there is message from the dog, which there often is, but if the message is i'm doing great and i love life, it increases your burden. that was the message i got from my redmon, and there was a very good chance that continued treatment would help him. it happened he was unlucky and i lost him much too soon. more time is precious for both you and him, and it is a heavy question when a dog owns nothing in this world but his life. when there are options, when this or that might be worth a try, when the dog is game for anything, it is very very hard. in the short run you won't be confident about anything you decide upon, in the long run you may come to realize that there were never as many choices as you thought there were. you just have to muddle through. we all understand, we are all hoping for the best for everybody. ollie is going to love you with all his heart no matter what you do, and he will be satisfied no matter what. all he wanted was to be loved, and he has already won the game.  

[Sam I Am]

Tara I so totally get what you are going through. You don't ever want to let them go. Like others have said its all about quality of life. If he is still enjoying daily activities, see what the the next few weeks bring, when you have time to talk and think this through. its a really tough call and like PK said, one we all in the end have to make.

Big hugs to you and know we are all here for you

Lynn

[hheldorfer]

I feel your anguish.  It's an excruciating decision to have to make.  Let your love for Olie be your guide.  Only you and Olie know which path to take and, no matter where the path leads, we'll be walking alongside you.

 

Helene

[remltr]

Tara we all cringe when we read this. Our hearts go out to you and wish we could provide you an easy answer. PK is correct. Listen to Olie he will tell you what the right thing is to do.

 

Cost is obviously an issue and you have to judge whether it is worth whatever it will cost. That is the logical part. The fear of losing Olie is the emotional part. Trying to balance the two is difficult. Nobody wants to think that they wouldn't spend every dollar they have to save their own. But you have to give it strong consideration as it is part of the process.

 

Go with yours and Olie's heart, you will do the right thing for each other.

[kieiras mom]

You and Olie are in my thoughts and prayers . I also understand  your thoughts about non helping people who want to make all the decisions.

[utgaard]

My thoughts are with you and Olie.

[Tuesday]

Oh Tara!  I'm so sorry.  Please know how much support your have from all of us here - not matter what choice you make.  Human and Cairn footsteps next to you all the way.  ox

[oscar's mom]

Tara, my heart goes out to you and Olie. Please know no matter how difficult the decision you need to make we are here to listen and support you.

Olie loves you and know you will take care of him.

[Dempsy's Mom]

It is so very hard and draining to watch our best friends struggle.  Hugs and strokes to Olie.  So sorry Tara.  Olie has had the privilege to live 14.5 years with lots of love and attention and I am sure that he knows you are there for him now too.  Continued thoughts.

[Idaho Cairns]

Difficult time but you musn't go thru it alone--we will be here, caring and wanting to help in any way we can--just a posting or private message away. 

[beccadiane374]

So, so sorry you are going through this, Tara...hugs to you & prayers for both you & Olie.

[Islander]

Thinking of you and hoping for the very best outcome possible.

Love and light.

[Zekey's Mom]

Very sorry to hear this. Hope you reach a decision that gives you and Olie peace.

[Tami]

Oh no, this is such a difficult decision that is ahead of you. Hugs to you and Olie. Whatever you decide know that Olie loves you lots.

[arseovrteakettl]

Best wishes for you and Ollie in this sad time. Even now he will smile for the both of you.

[tlwtheq]

Saw the surgery specialist yesterday.  He thinks he can significantly "de-bulk" the tumor while

maintaining continence.  There's no guarantee, of course, that it won't grow back with

renewed vigor.  But I think it's worth a try.

 

What does everyone think?

[shergry]

We had a tumor remove in the same area of which you speak on our Ashes.  He never had a regrowth up till age 18.  We were thoroughly happy with doing the procedure.

He never had a problem doing his business.  Just made sure he did have a movement, at least one a day.

Hope you the best for you and Olie!!!

[Pepper Bug's Mom]

Well...I would do the surgery just for your peace of mind!  Ollie is a member of your family and you love him so!

[hheldorfer]

I would vote for surgery - assuming it's financially doable and you feel confident in the surgeon.